The Journey of Contentment Part 2

*Disclaimer* - I apologize for the rawness and the scattered thoughts in this post - it's been a long week.

It's been just under a week since I have begun this journey of going through lent with contentment. Let me just say that right from day 1 I have been put to the test so to speak. For the past 5+ years I have been taking a medication that has become my lifeline in many ways. It helps me to function. It makes the world seem better in my eyes. After some recent discussion with my doctors it was recommended that I go off of this medication. The thinking behind this was that my doctors think this medication could be playing a role in the cause of (or at least contributing) to the intensity of my headaches.

So, I am currently on day 6 of my detox from these meds and let me just say that I am not enjoying this one bit. Prior to this last week, I felt in control, somewhat content where my life was, the work I was doing, etc. Now, all of a sudden, I have been thrown a curve ball and let's just say that I no longer am in control of the things that I used to be. My goal through lent was to relinquish control over the things in my life to God in order to be content with just God and I suppose that I am learning to do that right from the get go. It's been a tough week to say the least.

"Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God. Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart. I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming God's Message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears."
~ Philippians 1:3-6

The above verse has been on my mind as of late - it's been something I am clinging to. There are moments in my day where allowing God to lead and control will be hard, but I am trusting that this is just a part of the work God is doing in my life. I am praying that the contentment in allowing God to lead me through this journey will come - that the anxiety of the present moment will leave and that I would have the energy and the head space to draw closer to Jesus through this season.