feasting in care.

This lenten season has challenged me to feast. I am journeying to the cross wrestling with what it means to feast in uncertainty, to feast in thanksgiving, to feast in forgiveness and tonight, the word is to feast in care. This journey to the cross has not been a smooth, leisurely walk - it resembles much more like a stumbling mess, but no less full of grace.

In a season of busyness and unrest, care seems like just another thing to add to my never-ending "to-do list". The concept of caring for myself seems all well and good and it makes perfect sense, however, being able to put that concept into action is a whole other story. I'm 28 years old and I fail miserably not only at caring for myself, but also allowing others to care for me.

But if I were to spend some time sitting in the gospels, reading through the different accounts of Jesus' life, I'd probably notice that even Jesus took time out to both care for himself and to allow those around him care for him as well. 

Mark 1:35 - "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed."

We are still in the first chapter of Mark - the beginning of Jesus' ministry and he is already modelling what it means to experience a true filling of one's heart, mind and soul. In the midst of ministry and busy-ness, Jesus demonstrates his intentionality of taking a timeout to care for his physical, emotional and spiritual needs. Unfortunately, we don't always get the time and space we desire to spend with God as we see in the next verse. We discover Jesus' disciples, who are frantically searching for him, informing him of the crowd and "schedule" that awaits. The time of quiet and intimacy with God may have been short-lived, but nonetheless, there is a need for consistent and intentional communion with the Father in order to maintain a pace of life that enables us to do ministry well. Caring for ourselves enables us to posture ourselves in a spirit of steadiness. Feasting in care requires making space for solitude and taking on a posture of attentiveness to the voice of God, even in the midst of busyness.

Mark 14:3-10 - This particular snapshot of Christ's journey to the cross perks something in my heart each time I read it. There is an overwhelming beauty that draws me into this story and the relationship between Jesus and this woman of Bethany. She leaves her mark, not only on Jesus, but on "wherever the gospel is told". This unnamed woman of Bethany comes into the room where Jesus and his disciples are eating and breaks open an alabaster jar of expensive perfume over Jesus in preparation for burial. This jar of perfume represents an extravagance of giving something for another person - this jar of perfume would have cost her about a year's worth of wages or possibly even her inheritance. The cost was great. She recognized who and what Jesus was and lavished upon him such deep love despite the cost to her. Jesus, knowing exactly what this jar of perfume would have cost, does not turn away the woman's offering, but rather praises her for what she has done. Jesus soaks in the care offered to him. Feasting in care challenges us to take in the extravagance of the love and care that people extend to us. 

Mark 14:32-42 - The height of the passion week is almost upon us when we get to Gethsemane. Jesus knows full well the path that lays before him. The journey to the cross is far from easy, even for Jesus. Right from the beginning of Jesus' ministry, the concept of community and doing life with those around us has been key. Why should anything be different when life becomes overwhelmingly difficult? Knowing that the road ahead is not easy, Jesus invites Peter, James and John to come away with him, to pray with him and I'm thinking to pray for him as well. Jesus invites his community around him to care for him. Jesus chooses to bring others around him and into the hard stuff rather than choosing to walk the road alone. Unfortunately the disciples miss out on taking the opportunity to stand in the gap so-to-speak for Jesus by falling asleep, but that's a whole different story :) Feasting in care presents us with opportunity to bring people into the messiness and to learn what it means to do life with each other.

So, I continue my journey to the cross, taking in the extravagance of Christ's love and care for me as his child. O Lord, soften my heart to take in the depth of your love and the care of those in my life.