thanks.

• stories of transformation.
• rap concerts where we had the chance to bust out some new moves :)
• mountain top and valley experiences - God is in them both!
• much needed afternoon naps.
• the comfort of chai lattes.
• the anticipation of sleeping in my own bed again.
• laughing so hard that your jaw hurts.
• worship that ushers you in to a thin place of intimacy with Jesus.
• the joy being on team brings

Here is a little glimpse into our week at SOAR Saskatchewan.

Fresh IE Concert at City Centre Church. photo credit: SOAR SK Media team

photo credit: SOAR SK Media team

Worship. photo credit: SOAR SK Media team

Team meeting coffee at City Perks...best cup of coffee ever.

Journeying to the Cross

The lenten season is upon us. Being in the midst of a busy season with work, I will admit that the days and weeks leading up to Ash Wednesday were not necessarily focused on what I was planning to set aside for the next 6 weeks in order to draw nearer to Jesus. In fact, I will be the first to admit that I've never been all that great at "giving up" for lent. It's not that I can't live without tv or Facebook or certain foods (ok, maybe I can't live very long without coffee...in fact, I'm almost certain that my body would go into shock or some sort of failure without coffee), but past experiences have shown that the cutting out of various forms of technology and unhealthy food does not result in more time, more intimacy spent with God. Rather than being challenged to "give up" for lent, my focus is instead shifted to the addition of something to my life.

So, what is it that I am adding to my life?

Simply put, I am choosing to feast in thanksgiving as I make my way to the cross over these next 6 weeks. The word feast has become significant to me over the course of the last little while, as I explained a few posts back. This notion of feasting - an unusual or abundant enjoyment - is an invitation for me to take time to get away with Jesus. Feasting leads me to a place of intimacy.

The word thanksgiving has also become increasingly significant over the last few days, personally and as we as a staff team have been preparing for SOAR. Through various conversations with friends and mentors, I have been both challenged and encouraged to return to a place of thanksgiving. For the past year and a half in particular, I have been on a journey learning what it means to give thanks - to be attentive to the ways in which God moves and transforms through the little things. I must confess that thankfulness has not  necessarily been a part of my vocabulary for the last 6 months as I have allowed doubt and fear to creep in and veil my eyes from truly seeing. I want to return to a place of posturing myself and rooting myself in thanksgiving.

"The password is thank you"

These wise words given to us as a SOAR Saskatchewan planning team by one of our intercessors. What a good word. When we choose to take on a posture of giving thanks, we find ourselves able to enter into locked doors, to enter into rooms we might not have otherwise been able to enter. Thanksgiving unlocks doors. We as a team have come to love those words and we will continue to sit with them throughout the week ahead in particular.

I can't help but think that those same words, "the password is thank you" is the key to journeying to the cross. How can we truly grasp the significance and the power of what Christ accomplished on the cross if we fail to practice thanksgiving? I want to be intentional in choosing to give thanks. When we choose to clothe our hearts and our minds in thanksgiving, we are promised that we will experience a peace that exceeds all understanding. But thanksgiving must come first.

"Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you’re on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute!

Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life." ~ Phil. 4:4-7

So, as I walk out this season of lent and make my way to the cross, I am choosing to center my heart and mind around these verses - that I might not only posture myself in thanksgiving, but that I would revel in the presence of Jesus and take in the extravagance of his love for me.

Choosing thanks for...

• coffee that dispels sleepy eyes and tired minds.
• 44 teenagers who will experience heart, mind and soul transformation as they spend their school break in the inner city of Saskatoon.
• air-mattresses that make sleeping in a church slightly more comfortable.
• co-workers who encourage, who inspire, who empower, who love, who laugh and who I am privileged to do life with.
• a God who speaks.

And we're off

After months of planning and praying, the time has come. SOAR Saskatchewan is starting, whether we are ready or not :) If I'm being honest, I will admit that I am heading into program exhausted and at times, with a head completely overwhelmed with thoughts. Entering into program mode is a bag of emotions. Underneath the the 'to do' lists and budgets, organization and the fear of "what have I gotten myself into", is an incredible excitement that has been building for months, knowing that God is going to show up and he is going to move and he is going to transform. Being on program holds many good things - worship, intercession, sessions and community, but for me, the best part about being on program is coming back together at the end of the day and hearing the stories of how participants encountered the presence of Jesus and how their hearts and minds are being transformed through mission.

Wine and a movie while I finish up some last minute packing.

So tomorrow, bright and early, despite the weariness that currently resides in my body, I will be getting into a vehicle and making the 8 1/2 hour drive to Saskatoon, trusting that God will renew my heart and mind and restore energy and passion. It is my prayer that I would remain attentive to the Spirit and may this heart of mine be awakened in ways that cannot even be imagined. May SOAR be yet another opportunity to learn what it means to feast.

Late Night Thoughts on Feasting.

Over the past week and a bit, the word 'feast' has come into my mind on numerous occasions and I find myself completely drawn and mesmerized by the concept. I'm not thinking of this word in the typical use of the word as it pertains to physically eating, but rather the meaning behind the word. Let me try to explain.

Miriam Webster defines the word 'feast' as follows:

a) an elaborate and usually abundant meal often accompanied by a ceremony or entertainment.
b) something that gives unusual or abundant enjoymentfeast
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I LOVE the second definition, particularly the words abundant enjoyment. This whole notion of 'feasting' first appeared last weekend. Our office team was out in Saskatoon hosting a weekend retreat resourcing a group of intercessors across the prairies on prayer. Not only was it neat to gather together such a dynamic group of intercessors who have a heart for the nations, but I am always amazed at how God moves and works in the hearts of those gathered - myself included.
I will admit that going into the weekend, I was not overly excited. An intense, focused time of prayer requires a certain level of vulnerability - both with the Holy Spirit and also with others in the room. I'm not always very good at the vulnerability piece (I have a tendency to be a little stubborn...shocking, I know!) But, as the weekend progressed, there were some holy moments as I allowed myself to be both vulnerable and available.

We read through Psalm 23 as a group and we asked God to give us each a word, a phrase or an image from the Psalm that we needed to focus on. For me, the words were,

"as I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me...you prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies".

It's not so much about the words in particular that grabbed my attention, but rather the picture of what it must look and feel like to move from a place of famine and hardship into a place of abundance and feasting. There are promises in these verses...God walks with us through the valleys and a feast awaits us on the other side. I imagine that if one never experienced a period of darkness or uncertainty, he or she would not be capable of experiencing the richness and the extravagance of a feast in all of its fullness. That movement from famine to feast invites restoration and refreshment - physically, emotionally and spiritually for the soul. A relationship with God does not promise unending feasting. Scripture is explicit in that there will be valleys of death that we will need to walk through, but as we figure out how to walk that road we are also invited to feast in the uncertainty - to feast - to experience abundant enjoyment in knowing that we do not walk the road alone and that restoration awaits us.

Next, we read through Matthew 9:9-13. It's a very different kind of picture. There are no quiet meadows or bubbling brooks to lay beside. Rather, I imagine a scene of chaos - loud voices as 'bad ass', scruffy men - outsiders if you will, sit around a table sharing a meal, and yet, the word feast continues to ring in my head. Among this group of outsiders sits Jesus. These men, despite their flaws and foul language are doing what Jesus longs for us all to do...to feast in his presence - to truly soak him in. In verse 13 we read,

"Go and learn what this means, I desire mercy, not sacrifice".

I often equate mercy to grace. Jesus knew who these men were - tax collectors, some of the lowest in society at the time and yet, Jesus modelled grace and mercy to these men. Jesus invites us to feast in grace...to feast in forgiveness. Could it be that choosing to feast in forgiveness and grace could bring abundant enjoyment? If that's the case, I want to learn what this means...to desire mercy and grace.

I have much to learn about what it means for one to feast in uncertainty, to feast in God's goodness, to feast in forgiveness and to feast in grace.
Regardless of the learning curve ahead of me, I choose to feast.